Sunday, December 2, 2018

Distance

There's a hole in the middle of the prettiest life 
So the lawyers and the prophets say. 
Not your father nor your mother nor your lover's ever gonna make it go away. 
Now there's too much darkness in an endless night 
To be ashamed of the way we feel. 
Let's be kind to each other 
Not forever but for real.
David Wilcox, "For Real" (1996)

November has been a blur. The month began with the two of us separated by 2000 miles. Lindsay flew to Orange County at the end of October to immerse herself in important relationships and projects, while Tom stayed behind in Michigan for a veritable bevy of events on the calendar. "Dividing and conquering" sounds far too colonizing, but it was something like that. We re-connected mid-month for family time, some book gatherings and the wedding celebration of Chris and Alyssa Dollar on the beach in San Clemente!


The book tour has stopped in Pennsylvania, Ohio, Michigan and Southern California (Costa Mesa, Encinitas and L.A.). We will have a couple more Midwest gatherings in December and a half dozen more in Southern California and the Pacific Northwest in January. In these circles, we are sharing our spiritual Journey of the past fifteen years. We are also getting the opportunity to listen to the sighs and groans of others who yearn for Something more. We continue to feel hopeful that the daily grind of the Trump regime is providing a wake-up call to many who are now seeing more clearly the destructive nature of religion that stays spiritualized and futurized. Where are the alternative faith spaces that reject the status quo and risk imagining liberating possibilities for the exploited and extracted and for the millions still stranded on a lonely island of poverty in the midst of a vast ocean of material prosperity?

Being interviewed at The Loft L.A. (10.25)
(s/o Josh Lopez-Reyes for the connect 
& for organizing such a meaningful time of sharing)

We are separated by distance once again. A little over a week after the 3rd anniversary of Tom's Dad's passing, he drove Dennis's old Toyota Corolla a thousand miles north to Bend, Oregon. The road trip north evoked feelings of both sadness and gratitude, reminders of important places Dad took us: college basketball games at UCI and UCLA; vacations at Sequoia, Yosemite and Mt. Lassen; a snowy trek over the Siskiyou Summit for Christmas 1982 in the old family station wagon; a rambunctious river-rafting trip on the American River in the mid-90's; Dad's undergrad days at Oregon State (1960-1964); Tom's cousin's wedding in the Trinity Alps in 2008.

We will be back in Michigan together in a couple days to spend the Advent Season together. We have sworn to each other (over the phone): no more of this extended time apart!!!!
Side note on coupleship: We are able to function fairly well as "two ships passing in the night." It can be a real gift, to be sure, as well as fruit of meaningful support drawn from multiple other blessed wells of nurture in our lives (huge s/o this month goes to Nance and her epic "corner bar" ministry! 😉 We see you, Nance - thanks for being one of Lindsay's foremost elders, and invaluable source of that "ground of being" kind of support).
However, we also really miss each other (!), and are generally deeply grateful to get to live, work, laugh, cry, and play through this life together.
Runs, happy hours, dance polos to the nephews, and nightly winter walks along the Huron - we see you, too! #comingatyou



 Here are some glimpses of the people and places we've savored (together or solo) over this past month.

Seasons converge in Ypsilanti, MI.

Meanwhile, these muppets spend
the afternoon wading in the water.
A circle of a dozen huddled in a
living room in Southwest Detroit.

Friends old and new gathered around a
fire in a backyard in Northern San Diego.

Playing trains in Pasadena with Tiff and Jude!

Lindsay caught Sir Sly in Santa Ana,
just weeks after Tom saw them in Detroit.
Lindsay's first time, and it didn't disappoint!
(s/o Mama Gina for the hook-up & for meaningful time of connecting!)




Our dear friends Chris and Alyssa tied the knot on a
cliff overlooking the Pacific just before sunset.

On Thanksgiving, we engaged in some post-gravy
entertainment with the nephews: The Wizard of Oz!
 Between birthdays, school pick-ups and neighborhood parties, 
Lindsay got to spend ample time hanging with & getting to know 
some of Riley & Mason's best buds.
A clear highlight of the month! 

And so many more we neglected to get photos with! 
Thank you - all of you - for who you are, 
and all you are doing in your place(s), 
to listen to and meet our groaning world 
with increasingly measures 
of dot-connecting, truth-telling, healing, and justice.
We are so grateful to know and be encouraged, inspired, and supported by you.

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